dayName = new Array ("Sunday", "Monday", "Tuesday", "Wednesday", "Thursday", "Friday", "Saturday")
monName = new Array ("January", "February", "March", "April", "May", "June", "July", "August", "September", "October", "November", "December")
now = new Date

Jan = new Array
Jan[1] = "If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants./Isaac Newton"
Jan[2] = "We are what we pretend to be, but we better be very careful what we pretend./Kurt Vonnegut"
Jan[3] = "No matter how much the cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens./Abraham Lincoln"
Jan[4] = "Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one./Malcolm S. Forbes"
Jan[5] = "Education produces good citizens by rewarding obedience and thwarting creativity./Isaak Munger"
Jan[6] = "Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other./Ann Landers"
Jan[7] = "There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full./Henry Kissinger"
Jan[8] = "It is not the horse that draws the cart, but the oats./Russian proverb"
Jan[9] = "All animals except man know that the ultimate of life is to enjoy it./Samuel Butler"
Jan[10] = "To gain that which is worth having, it may be necessary to lose everything else./Bernadette Devlin"
Jan[11] = "Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there./Will Rogers"
Jan[12] = "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy./Shakespeare, Hamlet Act 1:5"
Jan[13] = "It is by will alone that I set my mind in motion./Mentat Prayer"
Jan[14] = "It is easier to get forgiveness than permission./Stewart's Law"
Jan[15] = "To be upset over what you don't have is to waste what you do have./Unknown"
Jan[16] = "There is not any memory with less satisfaction than the memory of some temptation we resisted./James Branch Cabell"
Jan[17] = "Blessed is the person who is too busy to worry in the daytime and too sleepy to worry at night./Unknown"
Jan[18] = "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits/Anonymous"
Jan[19] = "If practice makes perfect and nobody's perfect, why practice?/Unknown"
Jan[20] = "Start every day off with a smile and get it over with./W. C. Fields"
Jan[21] = "No man's knowledge here can go beyond his experience./John Locke"
Jan[22] = "Hell, there are no rules here--we're trying to accomplish something./Thomas A. Edison"
Jan[23] = "He who cannot agree with his enemies is controlled by them./Chinese proverb"
Jan[24] = "I disapprove of what you say, but will defend to the death your right to say it./Voltaire"
Jan[25] = "Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it./Mahatma Gandhi"
Jan[26] = "Never let your sense of morals get in the way of doing what's right./Isaac Asimov"
Jan[27] = "True knowledge exists in knowing that you know nothing./Socrates"
Jan[28] = "And in knowing that you know nothing, that makes you the smartest of all./Socrates"
Jan[29] = "Any fool can make a rule, and any fool will mind it./Thoreau"
Jan[30] = "The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about./Oscar Wilde"
Jan[31] = "The mark of a good action is that it appears inevitable in retrospect./Robert Louis Stevenson"

Feb = new Array
Feb[1] = "Emancipate yourself from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds./Bob Marley"
Feb[2] = "We must become the change we want to see./Mahatma Gandhi"
Feb[3] = "Let's just say I was testing the bounds of society. I was just curious./Jim Morrison"
Feb[4] = "Wine gives courage and makes men more apt for passion./Ovid"
Feb[5] = "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step./Lao-Tsu"
Feb[6] = "There is only one blasphemy, and that is the refusal to experience joy./Paul Rudnick"
Feb[7] = "But my dear man, reality is only a Rorschach ink-blot, you know./Alan Watts"
Feb[8] = "Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler./Albert Einstein"
Feb[9] = "I'll publish right or wrong. Fools are my theme, let satire be my song./Lord Byron"
Feb[10] = "Words ought to be a little wild for they are the assaults of thought on the unthinking./John Maynard Keynes"
Feb[11] = "What we imagine is order is merely the prevailing form of chaos./Kerry Thornley"
Feb[12] = "All that we are is the result of what we have thought./Buddha"
Feb[13] = "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it./George Santayana"
Feb[14] = "The wise learn many things from their enemies./Aristophanes"
Feb[15] = "All jobs are easy to the person who doesn't have to do them./Holt's Law"
Feb[16] = "Tis better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than open one's mouth and remove all doubt./Samuel Johnson"
Feb[17] = "No law or ordinance is mightier than understanding./Plato, Laws"
Feb[18] = "It is the province of knowledge to speak and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen./Oliver Wendell Holmes"
Feb[19] = "A man never stands as tall as when he kneels to help a child./Knights of Pythagoras"
Feb[20] = "Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness./Chinese Proverb"
Feb[21] = "The beginning is the most important part of the work./Plato"
Feb[22] = "Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes./Henry David Thoreau"
Feb[23] = "A free society is a place where it's safe to be unpopular./Adlai Stevenson"
Feb[24] = "Power does not corrupt. Fear corrupts... perhaps the fear of a loss of power./John Steinbeck"
Feb[25] = "It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers./James Thurber"
Feb[26] = "Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian./Robert Orben"
Feb[27] = "There is no security on this earth; there is only opportunity./General Douglas MacArthur"
Feb[28] = "Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless./Mother Theresa"
Feb[29] = "So of cheerfulness, or a good temper, the more it is spent, the more it remains./Ralph Waldo Emerson"
Feb[30] = ""
Feb[31] = ""

Mar = new Array
Mar[1] = "A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject./Winston S. Churchill"
Mar[2] = "The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes./Winston Churchill"
Mar[3] = "Life is a tale told by an idiot -- full of sound and fury, signifying nothing./William Shakespeare"
Mar[4] = "So, rather than appear foolish afterward, I renounce seeming clever now./William of Baskerville"
Mar[5] = "When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you./African proverb"
Mar[6] = "Life is too important to be taken seriously./Oscar Wilde"
Mar[7] = "It is seldom that liberty of any kind is lost all at once./David Hume"
Mar[8] = "Talk not of wasted affection; affection never was wasted./Henry Wadsworth Longfellow"
Mar[9] = "She had a pretty gift for quotation, which is a serviceable substitute for wit./W. Somerset Maugham"
Mar[10] = "Well, all I know is what I read in the papers./Will Rogers"
Mar[11] = "The voyage of discovery is not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes./Marcel Proust"
Mar[12] = "A friend should bear his friend's infirmities./Shakespeare"
Mar[13] = "A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature./Ralph Waldo Emerson"
Mar[14] = "Freedom is nothing else but a chance to be better./Albert Camus"
Mar[15] = "Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes./Lewis Grizzard"
Mar[16] = "The greatest way to live with honor in this world is to be what we pretend to be./Socrates"
Mar[17] = "It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues./Abraham Lincoln"
Mar[18] = "Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without./Confucius"
Mar[19] = "The most wasted of all days is one without laughter./e. e. cummings"
Mar[20] = "Logic is like the sword - those who appeal to it shall perish by it./Samuel Butler"
Mar[21] = "Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal./Albert Camus"
Mar[22] = "What the public wants is the image of passion, not passion itself./Roland Barthes"
Mar[23] = "Too often we... enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought./John F. Kennedy"
Mar[24] = "It is the part of a good shepherd to shear his flock, not to skin it./Latin proverb"
Mar[25] = "The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time./Abraham Lincoln"
Mar[26] = "The fault, dear Brutus, lies not in our stars, but in ourselves if we are underlings./Shakespeare"
Mar[27] = "Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it./P. J. O'Rourke"
Mar[28] = "Nature and Books belong to the eyes that see them./Emerson"
Mar[29] = "The greatest virtues are those which are most useful to other persons./Aristotle"
Mar[30] = "To err is human, to blame the next guy even more so./Unknown"
Mar[31] = "The best argument against democracy is a five minute conversation with the average voter./Winston Churchill"

Apr = new Array
Apr[1] = "From the sublime to the ridiculous is but a step./Napoleon"
Apr[2] = "What is written without effort is in general read without pleasure./Samuel Johnson"
Apr[3] = "There is nothing so absurd but some philosopher has said it./Cicero"
Apr[4] = "The tallest blade of grass is the first to be cut by the scythe./Old Russian saying"
Apr[5] = "Truly great madness cannot be achieved without significant intelligence./Henrik Tikkanen"
// end of words2
Apr[6] = "A thorn defends the rose, harming only those who would steal the blossom./Chinese proverb"
Apr[7] = "Blessed are we who can laugh at ourselves for we shall never cease to be amused./Unknown"
Apr[8] = "The public interest is best served by the free exchange of ideas./Judge John Kane"
Apr[9] = "It is easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them./Alfred Adler"
Apr[10] = "He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever./Chinese proverb"
Apr[11] = "The sum of intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing./Cole's axiom"
Apr[12] = "It's a recession when your neighbor loses his job; it's a depression when you lose yours./Harry S Truman"
Apr[13] = "The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously./Hubert H. Humphrey"
Apr[14] = "Honor isn't about making the right choices. It's about dealing with the consequences./Midori Koto"
Apr[15] = "When you have an efficient government, you have a dictatorship./Harry S. Truman"
Apr[16] = "Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work./Thomas Edison"
Apr[17] = "A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic./Joseph Stalin"
Apr[18] = "Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons./Bertrand Russell"
Apr[19] = "We believe that an informed citizenry will act for life and not for death./Albert Einstein"
Apr[20] = "All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence - and then success is sure./Mark Twain"
Apr[21] = "It is a melancholy truth that even great men have their poor relations./Charles Dickens"
Apr[22] = "When angry, count ten before you speak; if very angry, a hundred./Thomas Jefferson"
Apr[23] = "If you don't find it in the index, look very carefully through the entire catalogue./Sears, Roebuck & Co."
Apr[24] = "In individuals, insanity is rare; but in groups, parties, nations, and epochs it is the rule./Nietzsche"
Apr[25] = "Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards./Soren Kierkegaard"
Apr[26] = "It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it./Aristotle"
Apr[27] = "Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried./Mae West"
Apr[28] = "All who would win joy, must share it; happiness was born a twin./Lord Byron"
Apr[29] = "The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple./Oscar Wilde"
Apr[30] = "I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him./Galileo Galilei"
Apr[31] = ""

May = new Array
May[1] = "All men are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality./Martin Luther King, Jr."
May[2] = "I use emotion for the many and reserve reason for the few./Adolph Hitler"
May[3] = "Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the men of old; seek what they sought./Basho"
May[4] = "My evening visitors, if they cannot see the clock, should find the time in my face./Ralph Waldo Emerson"
May[5] = "A man who has committed a mistake and doesn't correct it, is committing another mistake./Confucius"
May[6] = "Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest./Mark Twain"
May[7] = "Crude classifications and false generalizations are the curse of organized life./George Bernard Shaw"
May[8] = "Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something./Plato"
May[9] = "You can fool too many of the people too much of the time./James Thurber"
May[10] = "He who wonders discovers that this in itself is wonder./M. C. Escher"
May[11] = "Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves./Abraham Lincoln"
May[12] = "The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity./Ellen Parr"
May[13] = "The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter./Mark Twain"
May[14] = "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources./Albert Einstein"
May[15] = "Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition./Timothy Leary"
May[16] = "Only the mediocre are always at their best./Jean Giraudoux"
May[17] = "The only thing that saves us from the bureaucracy is its inefficiency./Eugene McCarthy"
May[18] = "I was gratified to be able to answer promptly. I said, 'I don't know'./Mark Twain"
May[19] = "I wish people who have trouble communicating would just shut up./Tom Lehrer"
May[20] = "I never know how much of what I say is true./Bette Midler"
May[21] = "If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word./Dave Barry"
May[22] = "The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well./Joe Ancis"
May[23] = "Though I am not naturally honest, I am so sometimes by chance./William Shakespeare"
May[24] = "I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts./Will Rogers"
May[25] = "If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts./Albert Einstein"
May[26] = "An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out./Will Rogers"
May[27] = "Reality is nothing but a collective hunch./Lily Tomlin"
May[28] = "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by./Douglas Adams"
May[29] = "Your theory is crazy, but it's not crazy enough to be true./Bertold Brecht"
May[30] = "All I want is a warm bed and a kind word and unlimited power./Ashleigh Brilliant"
May[31] = "I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it./Ashleigh Brilliant"

Jun = new Array
Jun[1] = "Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain -- and most fools do./Dale Carnegie"
Jun[2] = "The problem with political jokes is they get elected./Henry Cate, VII"
Jun[3] = "Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level./Quentin Crisp"
Jun[4] = "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away./Philip K. Dick"
Jun[5] = "Freedom is just Chaos, with better lighting./Alan Dean Foster"
Jun[6] = "MEGAHERTZ: This is a really, really big hertz./Dave Barry"
Jun[7] = "If you believe everything you read, better not read./Japanese proverb"
Jun[8] = "I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it./Garrison Keillor"
Jun[9] = "Nothing succeeds like the appearance of success./Christopher Lasch"
Jun[10] = "Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember./Oscar Levant"
Jun[11] = "Part of being sane, is being a little bit crazy./Janet Long"
Jun[12] = "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it./Groucho Marx"
Jun[13] = "Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself./Friedrich Nietzsche"
Jun[14] = "Any man whose errors take ten years to correct is quite a man./J. Robert Oppenheimer (speaking of Albert Einstein)"
Jun[15] = "Sanity calms, but madness is more interesting./John Russell"
Jun[16] = "No problem is so formidable that you can't walk away from it./Charles Schulz"
Jun[17] = "The only winner in the War of 1812 was Tchaikovsky./Solomon Short"
Jun[18] = "I have learned to use the word impossible with the greatest caution./Werner von Braun"
Jun[19] = "Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong./Oscar Wilde"
Jun[20] = "Furious activity is no substitute for understanding./H. H. Williams"
Jun[21] = "Basic research is what I am doing when I don't know what I am doing./Werner von Braun"
Jun[22] = "I never think of the future. It comes soon enough./Albert Einstein"
Jun[23] = "I'm just trying to make a smudge on the collective unconscious./David Letterman"
Jun[24] = "Getting caught is the mother of invention./Robert Byrne"
Jun[25] = "Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance./Dave Barry"
Jun[26] = "Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn't./Mark Twain"
Jun[27] = "Ninety percent of everything is crap./Theodore Sturgeon"
Jun[28] = "It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend./William Blake"
Jun[29] = "Maybe this world is another planet's hell./Aldous Huxley"
Jun[30] = "It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything./Unknown"
Jun[31] = ""

Jul = new Array
Jul[1] = "I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong./Bertrand Russell"
Jul[2] = "Sometimes I need what only you can provide -- your absence./Ashleigh Brilliant"
Jul[3] = "Every nation ridicules other nations -- and all are right./Arthur Schopenhauer"
Jul[4] = "There is nothing so annoying as to have two people talking when you're busy interrupting./Mark Twain"
Jul[5] = "We are, each of us angels with only one wing; and we can only fly by embracing one another./Luciano de Crescenzo"
Jul[6] = "A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer./Dean Acheson"
Jul[7] = "To be free it is not enough to beat the system, one must beat the system every day./Anonymous"
Jul[8] = "Every revolution evaporates and leaves behind only the slime of a new bureaucracy./Franz Kafka"
Jul[9] = "An ambassador is an honest man sent abroad to lie for his country./Sir Henry Wotton"
Jul[10] = "One who condones evils is just as guilty as the one who perpetrates it./Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr."
Jul[11] = "Any effort that has self-glorification as its final endpoint is bound to end in disaster./Robert M. Pirsig"
Jul[12] = "If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything./Mark Twain"
Jul[13] = "The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winter./Dave Barry"
Jul[14] = "The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his./General G. C. Patton"
Jul[15] = "When the effective leader is finished with his work, the people say it happened naturally./Lao Tse"
Jul[16] = "Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives./Abba Eban"
Jul[17] = "Copy from one, it's plagiarism; copy from two, it's research./Wilson Mizner"
Jul[18] = "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing./Edmond Burke"
Jul[19] = "If one does not understand a person, one tends to regard him as a fool./Carl Jung"
Jul[20] = "And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years./Abraham Lincoln"
Jul[21] = "Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine./Unknown"
Jul[22] = "Professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous./Unknown"
Jul[23] = "If you can imagine it, you can achieve it.<br>If you can dream it, you can become it./William Arthur Ward"
Jul[24] = "If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?/Unknown"
Jul[25] = "Do what you can with what you have where you are./Theodore Roosevelt"
Jul[26] = "Never forget what you need to remember./Garrett Bartley"
Jul[27] = "Go Confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined./Thoreau"
Jul[28] = "You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus./Mark Twain"
Jul[29] = "A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the word you first thought of./Burt Bacharach"
Jul[30] = "How to make a million dollars: First, get a million dollars./Steve Martin"
Jul[31] = "I prefer tongue-tied knowledge to ignorant loquacity./Cicero"

Aug = new Array
Aug[1] = "I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type./Bob Hope"
Aug[2] = "I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type./Bob Hope"
Aug[3] = "Doing nothing is very hard to do...you never know when you're finished./Leslie Nielsen"
Aug[4] = "He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news./Bertolt Brecht"
Aug[5] = "To err is human but to really foul up requires a computer./Dan Rather"
Aug[6] = "Some people like my advice so much that they frame it upon the wall instead of using it./Gordon R. Dickson"
Aug[7] = "For fast acting relief try slowing down./Lily Tomlin"
Aug[8] = "I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer./Douglas Adams"
Aug[9] = "The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with./Marty Feldman"
Aug[10] = "If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style./Quentin Crisp"
Aug[11] = "Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city./George Burns"
Aug[12] = "I am definitely going to take a course on time management... just as soon as I can work it into my schedule./Louis E. Boone"
Aug[13] = "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work./Thomas Edison"
Aug[14] = "It's amazing how nice people are to you when they know you're going away./Michael Arlen"
Aug[15] = "When in charge ponder. When in trouble delegate. When in doubt mumble./Unknown"
Aug[16] = "There is nothing so annoying as to have two people talking when you're busy interrupting./Mark Twain"
Aug[17] = "I can resist everything except temptation./Oscar Wilde"
Aug[18] = "A diplomat is a man who says you have an open mind, instead of telling you that you have a hole in the head./Unknown"
Aug[19] = "The secret to managing is to keep the guys who hate you away from the guys who are undecided./Casey Stengel"
Aug[20] = "One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries./A. A. Milne"
Aug[21] = "People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing./Andrew Carnegie"
Aug[22] = "Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read./Groucho Marx"
Aug[23] = "The ultimate inspiration is the deadline./Nolan Bushnell"
Aug[24] = "We always admire the other person more after we've tried to do his job./William Feather"
Aug[25] = "I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it./George Burns"
Aug[26] = "There are two kinds of people, those who do the work and those who take the credit./Indira Gandhi"
Aug[27] = "Always listen to the experts. They'll tell you what can't be done and why. Then do it./Robert Heinlein"
Aug[28] = "I love being a writer. What I can't stand is the paperwork./Peter de Vries"
Aug[29] = "I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock./Henny Youngman"
Aug[30] = "Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret./Ambrose Bierce"
Aug[31] = "Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't./Erica Jong"

Sep = new Array
Sep[1] = "Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much./Oscar Wilde"
Sep[2] = "To stay ahead, you must have your next idea waiting in the wings./Rosabeth Moss Kanter"
Sep[3] = "USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population./Dave Letterman"
Sep[4] = "A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it./Bob Hope"
Sep[5] = "If your parents never had children, chances are you won't, either./Dick Cavett"
Sep[6] = "If you have a job without aggravations, you don't have a job./Malcolm Forbes"
Sep[7] = "I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by./Douglas Adams"
Sep[8] = "The only one who can tell you 'you can't' is you. And you don't have to listen./Nike advertisement"
Sep[9] = "We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail./Dave Barry"
Sep[10] = "No wonder nobody comes here--it's too crowded./Yogi Berra"
Sep[11] = "Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died./Erma Bombeck"
Sep[12] = "The Internet is a gateway to get on the net./Bob Dole"
Sep[13] = "I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm./Theodore Roosevelt"
Sep[14] = "The service you do for others is the rent you pay for the time you spend on earth./Mohammed Ali"
Sep[15] = "If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything./Mark Twain"
Sep[16] = "If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito./Unknown"
Sep[17] = "Automatic simply means that you can't repair it yourself./Mary H. Waldrip"
Sep[18] = "You can observe a lot by watching./Yogi Berra"
Sep[19] = "The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax./Albert Einstein"
Sep[20] = "The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts./Paul Erlich"
Sep[21] = "Airplane travel is nature's way of making you look like you passport photo./Al Gore"
Sep[22] = "History repeats itself; historians repeat each other./Philip Guedella"
Sep[23] = "You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jelly beans./Ronald Reagan"
Sep[24] = "My mother's menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it./Buddy Hackett"
Sep[25] = "Get your facts first and then you can distort them as much as you wish./Mark Twain"
Sep[26] = "You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake./Bob Hope"
Sep[27] = "Practical politics consists in ignoring facts./Henry Adams"
Sep[28] = "You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have for instance./Franklin P. Jones"
Sep[29] = "Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate./Thomas Jones"
Sep[30] = "The first rule of baseball is to get a good ball to hit./Rogers Hornsby"
Sep[31] = ""

Oct = new Array
Oct[1] = "When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out./Erma Bombeck"
Oct[2] = "The only man who never makes a mistake is the man who never does anything./Theodore Roosevelt"
Oct[3] = "Imagination is more important than knowledge./Albert Einstein"
Oct[4] = "Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines./David Letterman"
Oct[5] = "Threats don't work with the person who's got nothing to lose./Maduro Ash"
Oct[6] = "A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere./Groucho Marx"
Oct[7] = "Question everything. Learn something. Answer nothing./Engineer's Motto"
Oct[8] = "There are no facts, only interpretations./Friedrich Nietzsche"
Oct[9] = "Don't look back -- something might be gaining on you./Satchel Paige"
Oct[10] = "I base my fashion sense on what doesn't itch./Gilda Radner"
Oct[11] = "Trust, but verify./Ronald Reagan"
Oct[12] = "Always borrow money from a pessimist, he doesn't expect to be paid back./Unknown"
Oct[13] = "You can only be young once. But you can always be immature./Dave Barry"
Oct[14] = "Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia./Charles Schultz"
Oct[15] = "Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math./Seen on a bumper sticker"
Oct[16] = "If you can't convince them, confuse them./Harry S. Truman"
Oct[17] = "All my life I wanted to be someone; I guess I should have been more specific./Jane Wagner"
Oct[18] = "My own business always bores me to death; I prefer other people's./Oscar Wilde"
Oct[19] = "Tomorrow, do thy worst, for I have lived today./John Dryden"
Oct[20] = "If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments./Earl Wilson"
Oct[21] = "Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business./Tom Robbins"
Oct[22] = "Income tax returns are the most imaginative fiction being written today./Hemon Wouk"
Oct[23] = "What's another word for 'Thesaurus?/Steven Wright"
Oct[24] = "Bill Gates is a very rich man today .. and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions./Dave Barry"
Oct[25] = "A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing./Unknown"
Oct[26] = "Conform and be dull./James Frank Dobie"
Oct[27] = "A good conscience is a continual feast./Robert Burton"
Oct[28] = "The universe is full of magical things, patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper./Eden Phillpotts"
Oct[29] = "Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed./Mark Twain"
Oct[30] = "We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools./Martin Luther King, Jr."
Oct[31] = "Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind./Rudyard Kipling"

Nov = new Array
Nov[1] = "A thing derided is a thing dead; a laughing man is stronger than a suffering man./Gustave Flaubert"
Nov[2] = "Ideologies separate us. Dreams and anguish bring us together./Eugene Ionesco"
Nov[3] = "The only time you don't fail is the last time you try anything -- and it works./William Strong"
Nov[4] = "Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote./George Jean Nathan"
Nov[5] = "That government is best which governs the least, because its people discipline themselves./Thomas Jefferson"
Nov[6] = "I like to listen. I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen./Ernest Hemingway"
Nov[7] = "Man is the only creature that refuses to be what he is./Albert Camus"
Nov[8] = "There are no passengers on spaceship earth. We are all crew./Marshall McLuhan"
Nov[9] = "Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress./Ghandi"
Nov[10] = "Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing./Oscar Wilde"
Nov[11] = "Everyone is kneaded out of the same dough but not baked in the same oven./Yiddish proverb"
Nov[12] = "Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go./William Feather"
Nov[13] = "When people have no other tyrant, their own public opinion becomes one./Edward Bulwer-Lytton"
Nov[14] = "If one does not know to which port one is sailing, no wind is favorable./Seneca (the Younger)"
Nov[15] = "It's all very well in practice, but it will never work in theory./French management saying"
Nov[16] = "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere./Martin Luther King, Jr."
Nov[17] = "Where all men think alike, no one thinks very much./Walter Lippmann"
Nov[18] = "I have always thought the actions of men the best interpreters of their thoughts./John Locke"
Nov[19] = "A man will fight harder for his interests than for his rights./Napoleon"
Nov[20] = "A man's feet should be planted in his country, but his eyes should survey the world./George Santayana"
Nov[21] = "It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit./Harry S. Truman"
Nov[22] = "It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees!/Emiliano Zapata"
Nov[23] = "Philosophy is a battle against the bewitchment of our intelligence by means of language./Ludwig Wittgenstein"
Nov[24] = "How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it./Marcus Aurelius"
Nov[25] = "The trouble with our times is that the future is not what it used to be./Paul Valery"
Nov[26] = "There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action./Goethe"
Nov[27] = "A penny will hide the biggest star in the Universe if you hold it close enough to your eye./Samuel Grafton"
Nov[28] = "To change and to change for the better are two different things./German proverb"
Nov[29] = "Everyone complains of his lack of memory, but nobody of his want of judgment./La Rochefoucauld"
Nov[30] = "What lies behind us and what lies ahead of us are tiny matters compared to what lives within us./Thoreau"
Nov[31] = ""
Dec = new Array
Dec[1] = "I don't know who my grandfather was; I'm much more concerned to know what his grandson will be./Abraham Lincoln"
Dec[2] = "I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me./Winston Churchill"
Dec[3] = "It is error alone which needs the support of government. Truth can stand by itself./Thomas Jefferson"
Dec[4] = "The defining function of the artist is to cherish consciousness./Max Eastman"
Dec[5] = "Where observation is concerned, chance favors only the prepared mind./Louis Pasteur"
Dec[6] = "Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business./Dave Barry"
Dec[7] = "The man who makes no mistakes does not usually make anything./E. J. Phelps"
Dec[8] = "Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe./H. G. Wells"
Dec[9] = "Conscience is the inner voice that warns us somebody may be looking./H. L. Mencken"
Dec[10] = "There is real magic in enthusiasm. It spells the difference between mediocrity and accomplishment./Norman Vincent Peale"
Dec[11] = "Many attempts to communicate are nullified by saying too much./Robert Greenleaf"
Dec[12] = "The best way to have a good idea is to have a lot of ideas./Dr. Linus Pauling"
Dec[13] = "Be not afraid of going slowly; be only afraid of standing still./Chinese Proverb"
Dec[14] = "The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary./Vidal Sassoon"
Dec[15] = "Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else./Unknown"
Dec[16] = "Don't abuse your friends and expect them to consider it criticism./Edgar W. Howe"
Dec[17] = "When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth./George Bernard Shaw"
Dec[18] = "Hold fast to dreams for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly./Langston Hughes"
Dec[19] = "There is only one success - to be able to spend your life in your own way./Christopher Morley"
Dec[20] = "Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced./Soren Kierkegaard"
Dec[21] = "A man who is 'of sound mind' is one who keeps the inner madman under lock and key./Paul Valery"
Dec[22] = "A great many open minds should be closed for repairs./Toledo Blade"
Dec[23] = "Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess./Oscar Wilde"
Dec[24] = "I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it./Unknown"
Dec[25] = "For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball./Dave Barry"
Dec[26] = "But better die than live mechanically a life that is a repetition of repetitions./D. H. Lawrence"
Dec[27] = "He who thinks by the inch and talks by the yard deserves to be kicked by the foot./Unknown"
Dec[28] = "The effect of one upright individual is incalculable./Oscar Arias (also for uptight individuals)"
Dec[29] = "To safeguard one's health at the cost of too strict a diet is a tiresome illness indeed./Francios de La Rochefoucauld"
Dec[30] = "A friend is someone who sees through you and still enjoys the view./Wilma Askinas"
Dec[31] = "It isn't the mountains ahead that wear you out, it's the grain of sand in your shoe./Unknown"

function extractquote(str) {
pos = str.indexOf("/");
return str.substring(0, pos);
}

function extractauthor(str) {
pos = str.indexOf("/");
return str.substring(pos+1, str.length);
}

function testit() {
for (m = 0; m < 12; m++) {
for (d = 1; d < 32; d++) {
document.write(monName[m] + " " + (d) + "<br>");
if (m == 0) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Jan[d]) + "</i>&quot;" + "<br>- " + extractauthor(Jan[d]));
if (m == 1) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Feb[d]) + "</i>&quot;" + "<br>- " + extractauthor(Feb[d]));
if (m == 2) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Mar[d]) + "</i>&quot;" + "<br>- " + extractauthor(Mar[d]));
if (m == 3) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Apr[d]) + "</i>&quot;" + "<br>- " + extractauthor(Apr[d]));
if (m == 4) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(May[d]) + "</i>&quot;" + "<br>- " + extractauthor(May[d]));
if (m == 5) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Jun[d]) + "</i>&quot;" + "<br>- " + extractauthor(Jun[d]));
if (m == 6) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Jul[d]) + "</i>&quot;" + "<br>- " + extractauthor(Jul[d]));
if (m == 7) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Aug[d]) + "</i>&quot;" + "<br>- " + extractauthor(Aug[d]));
if (m == 8) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Sep[d]) + "</i>&quot;" + "<br>- " + extractauthor(Sep[d]));
if (m == 9) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Oct[d]) + "</i>&quot;" + "<br>- " + extractauthor(Oct[d]));
if (m == 10) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Nov[d]) + "</i>&quot;" + "<br>- " + extractauthor(Nov[d]));
if (m == 11) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Dec[d]) + "</i>&quot;" + "<br>- " + extractauthor(Dec[d]));
document.write("<br><br>");
} } }


function showquote(){
if (now.getMonth() == 0) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Jan[now.getDate()]) + "</i>&quot;" + " / " + extractauthor(Jan[now.getDate()]));
if (now.getMonth() == 1) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Feb[now.getDate()]) + "</i>&quot;" + " / " + extractauthor(Feb[now.getDate()]));
if (now.getMonth() == 2) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Mar[now.getDate()]) + "</i>&quot;" + " / " + extractauthor(Mar[now.getDate()]));
if (now.getMonth() == 3) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Apr[now.getDate()]) + "</i>&quot;" + " / " + extractauthor(Apr[now.getDate()]));
if (now.getMonth() == 4) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(May[now.getDate()]) + "</i>&quot;" + " / " + extractauthor(May[now.getDate()]));
if (now.getMonth() == 5) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Jun[now.getDate()]) + "</i>&quot;" + " / " + extractauthor(Jun[now.getDate()]));
if (now.getMonth() == 6) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Jul[now.getDate()]) + "</i>&quot;" + " / " + extractauthor(Jul[now.getDate()]));
if (now.getMonth() == 7) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Aug[now.getDate()]) + "</i>&quot;" + " / " + extractauthor(Aug[now.getDate()]));
if (now.getMonth() == 8) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Sep[now.getDate()]) + "</i>&quot;" + " / " + extractauthor(Sep[now.getDate()]));
if (now.getMonth() == 9) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Oct[now.getDate()]) + "</i>&quot;" + " / " + extractauthor(Oct[now.getDate()]));
if (now.getMonth() == 10) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Nov[now.getDate()]) + "</i>&quot;" + " / " + extractauthor(Nov[now.getDate()]));
if (now.getMonth() == 11) document.write("&quot;<i>" + extractquote(Dec[now.getDate()]) + "</i>&quot;" + " / " + extractauthor(Dec[now.getDate()]));
}